You can’t imagine it, Jessie J remarks. At that moment gearing up for her first album release in eight years, ecstatically in love with her recent boyfriend, and finally the parent to a young child after facing fertility challenges for a decade, on top of the world. Then in March she was diagnosed with breast cancer.
The musician, birth name Jessica Cornish, is famous for telling it as it is. The album, the provocatively titled album, was meant as an open book, addressing every moment of pain she’d endured since she last recorded music (endometriosis, losing a baby, failed relationships, psychological manipulation, suicidal thoughts) with her usual frankness. The first single, No Secrets, was dropped in the spring. But by then there was a mighty secret. The cancer. Later next release, her song Living My Best Life, came out in May and the artist was speaking publicly about how she was living her best life, while still secretly coping with the disease. Subsequently she went public, and in July she underwent breast removal surgery.
She shoots me her best “What the fuck?” expression. “I come out with a song called No Secrets. I’m giving every interview, and they inquire, ‘What’s happening?’ and I’m, like, ‘Erm, yeah, nothing …’” Cornish has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s awaiting follow-up surgery.
We meet at a photo studio in London. She is sporting a tan faux-leather coat, jeans with elaborate white patches, cream boots and big frames. Think motorcycle style meets 1970s Nana Mouskouri. “I feel like I’m in the 70s and I should have a boyfriend with a big tache.” A biker reference, I say, recalling the movie. “They used to call me that!” She smiles. Cornish is quick, irreverent and blunt. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is aiming for her standup debut in the coming year. “I love making people laugh. When performing I basically roast the crowd.”
Medical Challenges and Discovery
She was planning an performance at the awards show when she discovered a mass. “I quickly sought to get it looked at, had an ultrasound, and they told me, ‘It looks like nothing; your breasts are normal.’ And I responded, ‘Yet I sense it. I’ve got an achy arm and tingling in my hands whenever I get up.’ And they replied, ‘Well, let’s just do a biopsy?’ It happened on March 28, the post-birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was bad news she’d reach out on the start of the week. By then she had assured herself it was nothing. The way she describes it, it was simply too inconvenient to receive a diagnosis when she had many commitments.
“We’re two weeks away from releasing the album after years away and four years without a single. And the doctor messaged and said, ‘Can you talk at six?’ And I assumed, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I jump on the Zoom thinking it’s all going to be fine, and she says, ‘Please take a seat.’ The solemn tone? And she continues, ‘Unfortunately but your reports have indicated aggressive cancer.’” What was your reaction? “I said, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ Immediately I felt was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She considered the operation frightening and surreal. “I fear going under. They lead you. In urgent cases you go on a gurney, but then I just marched with a gown on and my rear exposed. It felt surreal.” But, Cornish says, she’s been fortunate. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the procedure. “It’s terrible, but you know what? Thank fuck I found it early. I had the mastectomy recently and my affected breast now resembles a fruit under fabric.” She smiles again. “The nipple was preserved.”
The subsequent surgery is therapeutic and aesthetic. Her chest, she notes, are now “different sizes. The implant is larger than before. That’s impolite! I thought, don’t add insult to injury, I’m already having a difficult experience. So rude! Ironically I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got obsessive tendencies, and I know they’d never be flawless. My plans were disrupted.”
A History of Health Challenges
Cornish is accustomed to medical issues. She thinks her attitude toward illness has been so upbeat because she’s experienced in medical emergencies. Frequently they align with career highs, functioning as a wake-up call, or punch in the stomach, to highlight not to take anything for granted. “Truly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘Enjoying yourself? Hold on.’ Ever since I was a child, it has often paired with moments of success for me; a serious or unusual issue has impacted my body.”
She takes me back to her childhood, already making her debut starring in the stage in a musical (she was cast at the age of nine years old). That’s when she was diagnosed with the heart condition Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome, which can cause a tachycardia as well as lightheadedness and irregular beats. “I attended rehearsals intermittently on an IV drip, and going back into hospital at night.” She jumps ahead several years, and teenage Jess has entered the trio Soul Deep while enrolled in the Brit School. “I just got my first record deal, and I had a stroke. Then when I was planning to release songs in recently I had a car crash and my larynx moved up and I lost my voice for a twelve months.”
Wow, I say, hold on, I need a moment. At just 17? She nods|agrees
